LOOK WHO'S BAAAACK!
Yes... yes... here I am.
Well it has been like FOREVER since I last posted.... uhhh...... yeah.
ANYWHO. Finished IDP at the house a few weeks ago and am now back at IDP in the offices down the streeeet from the house.
So far things SUCK. I hate going every day. I always sit there wanting to jump out the window. I honestly don't feel like I belong there. I'm too engrossed in my ED and I don't feel like I can do this all right now.
I mean, symptom use has been really bad, and the thoughts in my head have been going out of control. I keep trying to do things to distract myself but it seems nothing works. It all comes right back down to ED and what can I do to avoid eating or what not.
I feel hopeless.
I'm going to keep trying IDP and all and see how it goes. Hopefully things will get better. I know IOP is not where I need to be since I know I need the more support right now... maybe down the road IOP will work. If not, I think I'm just going to try and fix this myself.
I don't know how much more I can take of my life wasting away. I hate watching everyone in my life moving on and being so awesome and fantastic while I dwindle away with my ED... it's sad and pathetic.
Everyone is getting frustrated with me and I can't blame 'em. Heck, I'm frustrated with myself.
